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Bummed our son out

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fixerupper
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Joined: 12 Oct 2003
Posts: 15018
Location: Albert City Iowa

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:10 pm    Post subject: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

Last September Marilyn and I decided to pull the plug and buy a monument, or tombstone. We paid 1/2 down and planned to make the final design decision this winter. The other day we went to the monument company and decided on a final design. We told them we wanted to show it to our son before we made the final decision, so yesterday we showed him the paper with the design on it. He got down in the dumps about it which is a response we didn’t expect. To us it’s a mere business decision, it doesn’t mean we are going to die tomorrow. In fact We plan to look at that stone from above ground for a another 25 years or so. Our stone will be beside our daughter’s stone and I think it brings back memories of him losing his beloved sister.

So how many of you youngsters like us have your stone bought?
 
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Don S.
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:15 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

I'm seriously considering donating organs and a cremation.
 
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kcm.MN
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Joined: 20 Feb 2017
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Location: NW Minnesota

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:18 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

Far as we're concerned, they can throw us out for critter food when the time comes. Ain't got no more family, so why spend a lot of money for the crickets and grasshoppers to look at??
 
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Al L. in Wisc.
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Joined: 27 Jan 2001
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:21 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

My headstone is placed next to my late girlfriends. Shared base, my name is on hers and her name is on mine along with the name of my sister and mom and dads names. Been that way since 1999. I sure miss my 'live-in-angel'.
 
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fixerupper
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Location: Albert City Iowa

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:25 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

Al L. in Wisc. wrote:
(quoted from post at 21:21:16 02/13/1Cool My headstone is placed next to my late girlfriends. Shared base, my name is on hers and her name is on mine along with the name of my sister and mom and dads names. Been that way since 1999. I sure miss my 'live-in-angel'.


Our stone has two hearts connected by two locking rings with our wedding date below. I felt like telling Marilyn if she wants to divorce me she had better hurry up before the stone is set. LOL
I really don’t care if they dig a hole out in the field and throw me in but my family doesn’t see it that way.
 
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Bob
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:40 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

If that's what you want, I don't understand why you need your son's approval.

Me, I'm not so vain as to need a shiny marker, I've made instructions to simply toast me and spread my ashes on the garden plot on the old family homestead, where I spent my happiest moments as a kid.

To each their own!
 
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Dune Country
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Joined: 13 Sep 2008
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Location: Winchester Bay Oregon

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:46 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

CVPost-Bob wrote:
(quoted from post at 22:40:48 02/13/1Cool If that's what you want, I don't understand why you need your son's approval.

Me, I'm not so vain as to need a shiny marker, I've made instructions to simply toast me and spread my ashes on the garden plot on the old family homestead, where I spent my happiest moments as a kid.

To each their own!


yup, just dust in the wind!
 
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730virgil
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Joined: 05 Mar 2009
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 8:51 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

that's what mrs 730 wants her ashes will be scattered here where home is
 
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shinnery
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Joined: 18 Apr 2006
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Location: Hawley, Texas

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 13, 2018 10:11 pm    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

I cannot see taking up eighteen square feet of land forever. Just use whatever can be recycled and cremate the rest.
 
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farmerwithmutt
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Joined: 21 Sep 2013
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Location: sw wisc

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 2:44 am    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

Its nice to have a memorial someday walk
through a cemetery and read the tombstone
and somem have pictures that people are
proud of what was done. I had a bachelor
uncle who had the barn he spent so many
hours in on it. Also it's a family story to.
But your son is as you say thinking about
when he lost a sister and now is thinking
about the fact someday he's going to have to
say goodbye to the rest of the family. It's
good that you see that and are concerned for
him and his feelings .
For me i will be the last of my family and
my memorial will be simply giving stuff i
have to a museum and my ashes will be
scattered here i spent my life here so i
figure if the reaper is going to come
looking for me he'll know where to start.
 
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Bruce from Can.
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Joined: 09 Jul 2009
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 3:19 am    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

Went to a celebration of life memorial for a friend this past Monday. He passed away the week before on
Sunday morning, and the family followed his wishes and he was cremated , and this memorial was held.
I am now , after have attended a few of these type of "send offs " incline to think that this is in many
ways , a very good thing. I never cared for the whole standing around the deceased , receiving friends, and
remarking " how life like , and natural " they look, well they look natural for a dead person ... It makes a
lot of stress for family , if you don;t have to endure the whole funeral seen.
A celebration of life can be more upbeat and light hearted . And you can still by a plot and a stone if
preferred , but in 50 -100 years , who will know , who will care ? May as well plant a tree in your yard as
a monument , and bury the ashes there, and you can visit any time. Just makes more sense to me , and less
commercial. Each to their own.
 
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bobfeather
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 4:01 am    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

told my wife I wanted cremation and ashes spread at the places I got the most enjoyment out being at
would include the bush behind our house, the golf course and of course the beer store
any left over can go in the ash pile from the wood stove
bob
 
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John M
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Joined: 04 Feb 1999
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Location: Gray Court, SC

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 4:49 am    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

I will have a wake in a rented casket, most likely at the same funeral home where every person on Dads side of the family has been
for the last 100 years or so, just for the sake of the family. Wife is insistent on that. I will then be cremated. My ashes will
be spread in a couple of places. First will be in the Cooper River, either from the Yorktown, or off of the Ravenel Bridge, and at
the battery in Charleston. The rest are to be dumped in the woods behind the house. I already have my urn.
 
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Traditional Farmer
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Joined: 26 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 5:18 am    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

Make him feel better,tell him 100 years from now almost every living thing he comes in contact with will have returned to the Earth and been replaced.
 
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2underage
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Joined: 26 Aug 2014
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 14, 2018 5:40 am    Post subject: Re: Bummed our son out Reply to specific post Reply with quote

As I am ready to donate organs when I die I have left instructions to be turned into ashes after the harvest. I have been to several memorial or celebration of life services where there was no deceased body present and I thought that was the way to go. Lots of speakers talking about the good times they had and their great memories of the deceased.

I never could understand why anyone would want to look at a body in a decorated, flower covered box.
 
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