Selective Blindness?

[RedMF40]

This is a bit long but I'll try to stick to the main points, difficult as that may be for me. Over a month ago, well before the big health scare, I was cutting through a parking lot that serves the golden arches on my way to my real destination which was a barbecue joint that has good pulled pork sandwiches and even better--in my view--fresh cut fries. But I had to get through the neighbouring parking lot, this being an odd location with a lot of car traffic. As I'm creeping along, and the smoke from the BBQ joint is now coming through my open car windows, I see a stylish woman's hat lying conspicuously on the pavement. Nice hat. Not some beat up old ski cap you see discarded here and there. This was someone's hat. It was a breezy day, ok, but even if a hat like this had blown off some woman's head, she likely would have noticed. So I look around as I'm inching forward, trying to put this hat together with someone. Well, there she was--lying on the ground! In the flower bed just in front of the fast food joint, to be exact. Struggling to get up, it was obvious she needed help. I got my truck parked quickly, ran over to her. Meanwhile, the cars from the drive-through are passing right by this scenario, hat and all, oblivious to it. How could I be the ONLY one to notice this? She's right in the flower bed, for crying out loud! People like flowers, right? Maybe look at the flowers, see someone there who could use a hand up? Oblivious, everyone. The promise of a Happy Meal was maybe just too overwhelming, nothing else really mattered to them. The traffic inching through there had in fact just come from the drive-through window, so they obviously had more important things on their mind--Bic Macs, Double cheeseburgers, large drinks and so on. Oh, and avoid that hat sitting in the way. So I got to her, saw all her stylish things, much nicer than anything I own, scattered around. Big phone with all the features, designer handbag, and a nice outfit that suggested she cared about how she was put together when she went out into the world. She grabbed my hand and with some help from me managed to get herself up. I can't say she was frail, but maybe afflicted with some condition that made her very infirm and weak. She had an Uber car ride service waiting for her. The car was in fact just there--maybe twenty steps away. I am guessing, and maybe this is a stretch, but it's likely that driver is the same one who took her shopping and dropped her off. Now time to go home, wouldn't it be a good idea to check around, see where his passenger might be? No, apparently not. The driver was just sitting there at the wheel. Anyway, this is pretty anticlimactic, but I made sure at least she got to the car, was settled in, then I turned my attention to the pulled pork and fresh-cut fries at the BBQ joint. I'm not posting this to get a pat on the back or anything, since I'm sure everyone here would have helped the woman. But now I wonder with the current situation how everyone would handle it? Call an ambulance? The police? Still go ahead and help her? I still wonder at the "tunnel vision" of the many people driving by this woman and her hat.

 

[James Howell]

"[b:654c4848f0][i:654c4848f0]Selective Blindness?[/i:654c4848f0][/b:654c4848f0]"

No - worse; some folks don't want to get involved for various reasons.

Many years ago, I was standing in line at the Subway restaurant at the Student Union Building on campus.

There was a handicapped student with two arm braces at the back of the line that some how ended up on the floor.

There were several students surrounding him, but no one was helping him.

I walked over and asked him if I could help him get up.

I started pointing at different male students telling them to come help this poor fellow.

It took about 4 or 5 of us, but we finally got him up.

Sad thing was I had to remind him to thank all of the male students for their help.

 

[kcm.MN]

Wouldn't matter for me whether a man or a woman, if they're struggling to get up and I'm in a position to help, I likely would.

Sad thing is, in this day & age, you have to consider that every potential "good deed" is actually a trap. The person on the ground could be a decoy - if someone stops their car and jumps out with the engine running, some "bystander" who happens to be nearby then jumps in your car and takes off.

After dark, a whole slew of potential other possibilities.

Might even be that someone is falling-down drunk. I had that happen once while in another country. I couldn't smell the alcohol, but apparently she was just blitzed out of her gourd.

If I get burned for trying to help someone, that's something I could live with much easier than if I hadn't tried at all.

 

[Steve@Advance]

Hard to say why people do what they do.

It?s certainly nothing new, think of the parable of the Good Samataran in Luke.

I?m just as guilty, I typically don?t stop at accidents unless I see a real need. If others are already there, I assume they have it under control and I will just
be in the way and told to move on.

It?s fear of involvement, most people have the same mindset. Someone else will be better qualified, or they might do something wrong. Probably the
person is drunk or on drugs, might be combative and doesn?t want help...

The excuses are easy and they pop in my head quickly. Next thing I?m already past, so maybe next time.

I?ve tried to help a few strangers in need, some with success, some without.

One in particular, a very frail elderly man standing in the middle of the service road, hot summer day, cars driving around him with no regard.

I stopped, he got in, just looked at me like ?do I know you??

He told me he lived up there, pointing to a side road tha lead to a trailer park.

So off we go, looking for his house. Except nothing looked familiar...

He didn?t know his address, anyone?s phone number. I finally concluded he was probably an alzimer victim. I asked if he had any identification,he
handed me a wallet that must have had $10,000 in it! His ID showed a Minnesota address. He then started telling me stories of his working days.

I decided this was more than I could handle, knew there was a rest stop near where I had picked him up, so I went back that way to find a pay phone to
call the police, maybe someone was looking for him.

Sure enough, they were. He had wandered away from the rest stop. I turned him over to the search party, hopfully all turned out well.

Did I help, or delay? Who knows, at least I got him off the street before he got run over!

 

[Mike(NEOhio)]

I've offered people rides, pull-outs and jump starts but not for a long time. I'm not religious but I think things like that come around back to you. A few times I'd been stranded someone usually helped out. Driving home from work one really hot and humid day I saw an older guy walking so offered a lift. He was sweat-soaked and stunk like puke. Told me where he was headed then said "I'm so f....g drunk" At the next crossing road I said I had to turn here. Let him off and took the longer way home. Sometime it backfires.

 

[Tony in SD]

I?m finding some not all of the next generation is "all about me". Partly because they are so hooked to their phones that they would have to stop texting or talking so they could Google "How to help a lady out of a
flower bed?"

 

[Steve@Advance]

Mike, I picked up one of those one time! LOL

He was a middle age man, over weight, walking shirtless and barefoot on a very hot day, country road, middle of nowhere.

He was staggering around, I thought because of the hot pavement, which was part of it, but he was also extremely drunk!

After he got in, I realized what had happened, someone had put him out for being obnoxious. He even started getting rude toward me, I told him this ride can end right here...

He settled down, I dropped him off at a little country store where there was a pay phone, gave him a quarter, told him to spend it wisely!

 

[RedMF40]

Yes, lots of pitfalls of trying to help out, being a Good Samaritan. And I hadn't considered the whole thing could be a setup, something that would not be unheard of in that area. You never know. As for being drunk, I would have smelled the alcohol, that's something that's hard to hide. Just appeared to be an older woman, maybe late 60s, not much English but she did thank me and hopefully the rest of the day went better for her. No one wants to be helpless, has to be a terrible indignity falling down, unable to get up. Some random stranger comes along. I'd hate all of that, just couldn't bear it. IF nothing else, made me look at my own two legs, gave me an appreciation of just how good it is to get around, be mobile, stuff most of us take for granted.

 

[Billy Shafer]

Hard to read when it is all bunched up like that.All I can say is.I am 69 and I was raised to all ways help. Color or gender did not matter. They were people that needed help. And dad always told us. To do what we could to help.

 

[Crazy Horse]

I hear ya Tony but I think we have to remember, there were ALWAYS people that behave in ways that we think are unacceptable. Why do we think, often on this forum, that these kinds of behaviors have just shown up in the last 20 years or so? Name me one negative human behavior (other than something with cell phones and computers) that is new. Murder, assault, drunk driving, child abuse, cheating on your taxes, keeping a mistress, inappropriate language, cheating at cards, and yes .... not helping someone who has fallen down.

 

[1948CaseVAI]

About 5 years ago a mid-age woman was in line at the drive through to Taco Tico when she had a stoke. She had he car in Park and the window down. Couple of scum bags noticed her apparent distress and took her wedding ring right off her dying finger and left the area. Fortunately a security camera caught it and they ended up prosecuted for the theft. By the way she ended up DRT - dead right there.