Giving kids experiences

[Brent in IA]

Reading the post below about kids and common sense made me think about how I learned all I know, and how my dad,grandpa, uncles and employers have let me "try things" and learn on my own and have taken the time to coach me over the many years. I try to take the same approach with my kids, safely but not to the point of inhibiting their learning. It has gotten me in trouble a few times, such as when my 10-year old ran in the house and yelled - HEY MOM, I CUT METAL WITH FIRE!!! after he made his first oxy-acetylene cut with me. They know their limits, know not to touch power tools or tractors when I am not there, and so far we have had zero (farm) accidents and the kids are now 13, 15, 18 and 24. This picture was taken on my phone's camera just last night as I gave my 15-year old son 5-minutes on the rented excavator as we dug a hole for my daughters horse who passed on yesterday morning (sad day). He learned a lot in those 5 minutes, including that he was trusted and someone thought he was capable of doing a job many kids wouldn't have the chance to attempt let alone actually do. Teaching and learning are life-long and the more that occurs the better problem-solvers, and eventual teachers themselves, the kids can become.

Thanks for letting me put in my 3 cents...have a great day!

 

[Iowa_tire_guy]

I agree with you about this. Responsibility never can be attained by observation but by doing. And failing. When I was 8 my Dad had me on the JD A cultivating. When I was 14 he and my Mother took off to Colorado to buy cattle and left me in charge of the farm. That meant getting myself up, feeding the cattle and hogs, making breakfast and getting on the school bus at 7:30. Today too many kids are not given the chance to try, maybe fail and learn either way. On the other side my thoughts keep going back to a local family who had taught their two boys gun safety over and over again. I believe they were 8 and 13. You can probably guess the outcome here but the parents were both gone and my 13 year old daughter has one less student in her grade. It has been 2 years and it still haunts me. What is the balance?

 

[Anonymous-0]

Seems like there are more things to try to grab kid's attention now days with the computer and ipod world out there. But my little 2 year old girl Mackenzie loves to get up on the tractors and "drive" while they are in the shop. She will follow me around the farm with whatever I do.

 

[Anonymous-0]

ITG,
I feel your pain, having lost a couple friends in middle school and high school to firearm accidents.
How do you find that balance? We can teach skills but you can't teach judgement. My 14 yr old and I did a big woodworking project for Christmas and I taught him about tools and safety. We all teach how to do something correctly, but I also focus on "what can go wrong" because we all have done something by the book and it still goes haywire. This spring while I was on a trip he told me about using the tablesaw and chopsaw on his own and my heart was beating a mile a minute because of my fear, but he did everything right.
Good judgement comes from experience (and often bad ones)and youth do not have the depth of experiences to make good judgements. I say that as a very general statement about adolescents as a group only to make a point supporting what everyone has said thus far; give your kids lots of supervised experiences, let them fail and be honest about the mistakes you make. (Last year I almost flipped a backhoe, really scared me and I told my kids about it and what I was thinking that got me that close to tragedy)
Keep up the good work guys!!

Grub

 

[Brent in IA]

Experience is a great teacher. My son was on the loader tractor and I was on the Bobcat last year when I lifted a really heavy bucket and a front tire broke through a soft spot in the ground. I flipped onto the left side faster than you could blink and he saw the whole thing happen. I have NEVER had to remind him about buckling up on loader or Bobcat since then. Luckily noone was hurt, the Bobcat was undamaged, and a good lesson was the result.

 

[HENRY E NC]

I was only 6 years old when I learned to do some of the things around the farm such plowing spike tooth harrowing etc. I was really proud to be able to drive the horses on my own. I loved to ride the stone boat until the day I fell off forward and it went over me. Safety is something hard to teach the younguns. We understand it because of experience. I believe that young people need to get on and do as early as possible and teaching must always include the why, not only the action.

 

[buickanddeere]

Experience is an ideal teacher. Better yet learning from other people experiencing mistakes saves yourself the pain,expense,embarrassment and time lost.

 

[Iowa_tire_guy]

I always felt my goal in raising my daughters was to have them reach adulthood with the ablilty to make good choices. That meant letting them make unwise ones and suffer the results. Doing everything for them sure won"t teach them anything which is why I had no problem with them dropping out of 4H. After my oldest had her car for 1 month and repeatly being told to slow down on the gravel she flipped it in the ditch after loosing control on the gravel. It was a good experience because now she is a cautious driver. But she might not have walked away. It is tough but better than them reaching adulthood never having to made a real choice. At least you have some control over their choices and some limits. When they try to learn these after being adults they can really get into trouble.

 

[Anonymous-0]

It is very important to teach kids how to work but just as important to teach them how to play.

 

[Anonymous-0]

I just let my 9 year old drive the pickup pulling the haywagon while we picked up the bales off the ground today. Did a good job for the first time. Nice big field and the bales from the first 8-10 rows were already gone so nothing to run into. Had to use as mucn help as I could get before the rains came. Got it under cover just as the rain hit. My 12 year old has driven a few times also in the field. I figure several years driving around in fields will prepare them for the road better. BTW, both are girls.

 

[city farmer]

like it has been said here it is tough to teach safty on any age level being in construction we hire a lot of younger people it always scares me sending them out on job sites you cannot stress safty enough to them it is so eazy to get killed or hurt here they think they are invinsable to danger but you cannot teach them without this risk we were brought up young around tractors firearms and power tools they i have great respect for all yet not long ago i put my grandson on my h and was standing on the rear he was doing great till i ask him to push in the cluch while backing up very slow to a trailer he paniced and when i tried to get up ther to help sliped off and ended up under the tractor the tractor stalled and all was well but boy was i scared we had a safty lesson on why not to ride like i was doing could have been tragic glad he is not afraid of the tractors because of this you have to do to learn and you are going to make mistakes most kids don't get the chance to do things for them self thats why when they grow up they can not mow there own grass or change there own oil keep teaching and protecting the youth of our country

 

[Brad in WI]

This kid is not mine but I thought that he could use some good guidence. I put him to work pulling chopper boxes at my friends farm. After several loads watching me drive, and a few more with him driving and me riding along. He got the hang of it.

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He did get yelled at for waving or whatever instead of watching where he was going.

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He is growing up in the city of Green Bay WI and I thought that he could use the knowledge of everyday farm operations and the real definition of a hard days work.

 

[Anonymous-0]

a friend from grade school was shot in head by his brother when they were shooting tin cans.
jimmy was laying behind straw bales and jumped up as one of his brothers shot. he was in 4th grade that was 48 years ago i still think about him from time to time.

 

[Anonymous-0]

I could write a book about all of the close calls over the last 60 years. Not that we were careless or anything but we always had a lot going on, something to do everyday and all day long, so the law of averages applies. No one in the family has ever gotten hurt. I think living in the hills makes it even worse. Tractors and hills don't really mix to well. I try to supervise my son more than what I remember my Dad did with me or is that just being a dad. Our young people need to experience everything within reason and you can't protect them from everything.

 

[vitzarus]

Little kid on an awful big tractor.That's all. Little girl kid running the tractor okay tear me up. THEY HAD FAMILY TEACHING AND MONITORIng.!Family,they, and love, what can I say. They are the future.

 

[wayne2]

Seems like we all made it thru-praise lord-bbut high school locker mate killed self falling tree on own property,he had 30+ yrs experience. Wayne

 

[Brad in WI]

I am like another father to that little boy! His mother trusts him with me more than when he is with his own father. If I had any doubt if he could control it, he would not have been driving it. Some who have worked on a DAIRY farm know that often the workload is to much for a couple of persons to handle and extra help is needed wherever it can be found. just my .02 cents worth.