missing having christmas

[Anonymous-0]

1998 was the last time I had christmas, had divorce for xmas in 99 and my heart just has not recovered enough to get into the spirit of it again. I do have some lights up so maybe I'm not totally hopeless. Thought I might have some company this year but have not heard anything in a week or more. It kinda stinks when all you have is work.

 

[bo]

You're probably not alone. Still, it does suck. Have you thought of joining some type of social groups? Don't know what your interests are but I'll bet that there's somekind of groups which might interest you.

 

[MyrlfromPA]

Gary I wish you a happy holidays and merry Christmas too. I can understand about the working part and although not divorced yet I am still her alone on this night and brother it aint no fun !!! All that aside lets here it for RUM !!! good night all

 

[kurt:ky]

Gary in Texas my heart is out to you. My wife went to her moms after hearing about the forecloser on our place.Also I had found out real quickly about some bills she had not paid in town all in one week. Life will get better. Keep smiling it will help. Remember what my mom always said, have everyone put there troubles in a hat and after seeing everyone elses problems you will pick your own back out. I believe it.

 

[kurt:ky]

See Gary you are amonst friends. Merry Christmas.If we were closer we would come and see you.

 

[Anonymous-0]

Gary:

Think of it this way: Christmas ia about being positive in every thing and way's we conduct ourselves -- the more you are positive the quicker the cream comes to the top .. as the other gent said "things" will get better, and they will, but only if you keep Christmas in your heart the rest of the year. And before you can say I told you so your life will have the spirit that seems to be missing but really only needs stoking.. the fire is there and you are still alive " and not in Iraq" away from those who love you and touch your life each day. The best thing I can give you medicinally is a prayer... I pray your life will be aflame with the spirit of the Master and keeper of the stars, every day and in all things that you do.. God Bless your life, the spirit is just around the bend Gary.

 

[Ken Crisman]

Gary , keep your head up my friend . If ya ever want some support or to chat email me at [email protected] . I went thru a very bad seperation in 2000 after 33 yrs of marriage & finally the divorce 3 yrs ago . God bless, Ken

 

[Rickey H]

Been there and done that, Yes its sucks. I did find a light at the end of the tunnel and so will you, just don't stop looking for it. Wish you the best, Rickey

 

[old]

BTDT many times when I was in the navy. Being far from home and all is ruff on people in the military and yes for those who have no one at home to spend it with
Hobby farm

 

[Iowa_tire_guy]

Got a good wife and I thank God for that. But my best friend and Father passed away in October. Been handling it pretty good but am depressed this evening because I can't call and talk to him. Sure takes the joy out of Christmas even with my wife and daughters around to support me along with knowing a post here would bring in many replies of support. Death and divorce just rips our hearts out, but hearts are made to heal. Hang in there, keep you head up and don't live in the past. Get past it to the future. Easier said than done I know, but it's either that or what you are living through now.

 

[Anonymous-0]

After being owned for 20 years, I got divorced in 99 also. Brother and SIL stopped in tonight. That was my Christmas. I wish it could be better but, when I start feeling bad, I just remember what it used to be like. Heck, life isn't so bad after all.

 

[Anonymous-0]

You're not alone. Look how many friends you have on here. Dave

 

[Walt Davies]

Gary we had friends come by today with KFC and had a great dinner I hope that some of your friends will see that you are alone and will do the same.
Walt
PS join a senior center. Play Santa clause for the kids or something of that nature it really helps when you are used a big family get together like I was.
My wife was never at a big family Christmas with 60 to 100 people like it was in my family that I grew up with, I sure miss those days they were more fun than getting gift from Santa.

 

[Davis In SC]

Yes, the Holidays sure do make you miss the old days, Parents and Grandparents. Hate to say it, but I am glad when the holidays are over..

 

[Mark - IN.]

Gary, networking works both ways. Instead of waiting for someone to come visit you, what's wrong with you going out to spread some Holiday cheer with and for them? Not a thing, and perhaps, just perhaps they'd enjoy and appreciate it as much as you will. Rumor has it that its better to give than to recieve. And just a hint, if I may. If you do go out and spread some of that Holiday cheer, as I for one hope that you do, no mentioning the past. Nope, its all new horizons from here on out. And if you didn't want new horizons, you wouldn't have mentioned it.

Climb down off of that old mule and hop up onto a race horse. Merry Christmas, and a Happier new Year!!!

 

[Anonymous-0]

Will Rogers once said something to the effect that, most folks are about as happy as they set their mind to be. Some folks choose the drama of a soap-opera lifestyle; others get caught up in it, and don't have the will [or whatever] to get off the merry-go-round.

When I was in high school, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning how life wasn't treating me as I thought it should. My friend looked me in the eye and said that if I wanted things to change, it was up to me to take matters into my own hands and change them. You may feel powerless, but you HAVE the power to change the course of your life.

Isn't the definition of insanity doing the same thing over and over, and expecting the results to change? So if you want different results, it's up to you to change what YOU'RE doing...especially because you really can't control the actions of others. Think positive, and don't give up hope that you can effect a positive outcome.

I think Christmas is overrated, personally ...probably because my first wife died 5 days after Christmas in 1992. But I can choose to either be with family and friends over the holidays and enjoy them, or I can choose to be alone. The choice is mine alone. I simply choose NOT to be miserable and feel sorry for myself. Since it's been 8 years since your divorce, I would suggest that you move on with your life. Life WILL move on, with or without you. Choose to be a part of it, and the whole world looks brighter.

 

[kyhayman]

Wishing you all the best this holiday season Gary. But you are among friends here.

I cant say I know completely how you feel but I took my kid to his moms tonight at 8:30, wont see him again until Thursday. House seems pretty empty tonight.

But you are among friends here.

David

 

[37 chief]

Gary, as we go through life we will lose loved ones, through divorce, or death. The times together will always be rembered. I came from my daughters tonight with my wife. We passed by Dad's first farm where I grew up. Every thing is gone not even a nail is left. In place of our farm is now new houses. Mom and Dad are also gone, but you know what life goes on. Call a old friend tomorrow and wish him Merry Christmas. Stan

 

[Anonymous-0]

Sounds like maybe a new woman would bring you happyness?. Have you ever considered internet dating sites?.

 

[hayray]

Maybe you should look up family memebers, that is what I am doing, no wife, no kids to spend Christmas with. Also, maybe some friends local are having a party.

Merry Christmas, you are among friends here.

Ray

 

[Fudpucker]

Hang in there Gary. I'm spending Christmas alone this year too and your right it ain't much fun. I took my daughter to her Mom's house day before yesterday, but she may come home tomorrow. Your among friends here though. Seems like you got alot of good advice. Try jumping back out there and meeting some new people. You never know what good things the Lord has in store for you so give it a try. Merry Christmas my friend.
Fud

 

[Anonymous-0]

I don't really feel like I have any family, I have an aunt and uncle down the road, cousins both down and up the road and all around but nobody cares. I do have friends around but its kinda the same thing, I just happen on them at the store or somewhere. I feel kinda like a black sheep sometimes.

 

[Anonymous-0]

Don't feel alone, I took my son to his mom's for Christmas also, I have to work these Holidays and thats all I have besides working in my shop and on my property. I look forward only when I have my son back with me on my days off. We can hope for good health and family. I too was divorced in May of this year. Larry

 

[Anonymous-0]

I guess thats one of the things that has kinda calused me. My family(which consists of aunts,uncles,cousins)(my dad is in the nursing home,mom passed away in 95). They know I'm here, have for quite some time, some pass by the house daily. Do they ever stop, NO. Do they ever call, once in a blue moon(generally if something is wrong or they need something).
I wish I could go back in time(like most do) and go back to a time when more of my family was still alive(quite a few have passed away over th past 10 years or so). Gotta stay in the present and work for the future though.

 

[Anonymous-0]

Yea, started seeing one a couple of weeks ago, seen her two times and have not had much communication of any kind since. She emailed that work was real hectic as well as home and I know it can be but still at the same time I thought I might get squeezed in for a little time? I don't know anymore.

 

[Anonymous-0]

Thanks to all for the replies, I do appreciate it. I know my post may have sounded like I'm hung up in the past but I'm really not. This is one of those deals that you would just have to be here and all to understand it totally.

 

[fixerupper]

When I was a young kid my parents always invited three batchelor neighbors to our house for Christmas eve dinner. All three of them lived alone in their farm houses and had no close families to share the holiday with. After dinner we would open presents. I will never forget their expressions when they opened their gifts. I didn't realize how special that must have been for them until I was older and had a family of my own.

Now my wife and I go to three Christmas celebrations, two on my side and one BIG one on her side, (my wife is one of fifteen)but I have never forgotten the special Christmas dinners we had when I was a kid. Jim