OT-Morning Funnies

[Aaron Ford]

THE ACCIDENT IN IOWA
Ole had a car accident. In court, the trucking company's lawyer
was
questioning Ole. Didn't you say, sir, at the scene of the
accident, 'I'm fine,'?'
asked the lawyer.

Ole responded, 'Vell, I'll tell you vat happened. I had just
loaded
my favorite mule, Bessie, into the...'

'I didn't ask for any details', the lawyer interrupted. 'Just
answer the question.
Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?'

Ole said, 'Vell, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I
was driving down the road....'
The lawyer interrupted again and said,'Judge, I am trying to
establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told
the
Iowa Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several
weeks after the accident he is
trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell
him to simply answer
the question.'

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Ole's answer
and said to the lawyer,
'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favorite mule,
Bessie'.

Ole thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Vell as I vas saying, I
had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into da trailer and vas
driving her down da highvay
ven dis huge semi-truck and trailer ran da stop sign and smacked
my truck right in da side. I vas trown into one ditch and Bessie vas
trown into da other. I vas
hurting, real bad, and didn't vant to move. However, I could
hear Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just
by her groans'.

'Shortly after da accident da Iowa Highway Patrolman came to da
scene.
He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to
her'.

'After he looked at her, and saw her fatal condition, he took
out his gun and shot her right 'tween da eyes. Then the Patrolman came
across da road, gun still in hand, looked at me and said, 'How are you
feeling?''

'Now vat the hell vould YOU say?'

 

[Anonymous-0]

Ole's logic is right on target.

 

[Aaron Ford]

If your local Dairy Queen doesn't sell ice cream from September
through May, you may live in West Virginia.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they
don't work there, you may live in West Virginia .

If you've worn shorts and a jacket at the same time, you may
live in
West Virginia.

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
dialed a wrong number, you may live in West Virginia.

If you measure distance in hours - not miles, you may live in
West Virginia.

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once,
you
may live in West Virginia.

If you have switched from "Heat" to "A/C" in the same day and
back
again, you may live in West Virginia.

If you can drive 55 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard without flinching, you may live in West Virginia.

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but
leave
both unlocked, you may live in West Virginia.

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how
to
use them, you may live in West Virginia.


If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are
filled
with snow, you may live in West Virginia.

 

[rrlund]

I saw that same thing just the other day,but it said Michigan.

 

[balatonm]

Sounds like Minnesota.

 

[Aaron Ford]

So it's true there too! Reckon I would be right at home there!


Kinda weird how things don't change much no matter where yo go. Oregon and Nothern California really reminded me of home. Better roads, though.

Aaron

 

[rrlund]

I was in West Virginia this past summer vacationing. Loved the people and the scenery. Just wish I could say I felt better than I did about being there. Anxiety like you wouldn't believe. I think it might have had to do with driving the toll road south of Charleston or something. I was OK on the local roads. I spend a lot of time in Kentucky,the in laws live there. I wish I didn't have to say this,but I felt a huge relief as soon as I crossed the Kentucky border headed home. Maybe I'll come to WV again and just come in a different way.